Let Me Feel Alive With You
by BlueBumbler
Summary: While in the Forest of Death, Gaara splits from his brother and sister to search for the other contestants, eager to spill more blood. However, the genin he comes across awakens a lust much different from his blood lust... WARNINGS: Gaara/Lee, non-con, rape, blood. This story contains graphic depictions of rape - do not read if you are disturbed by such things.


The Forest of Death was deceivingly calm and quiet, the only sounds being those of birds chirping and leaves rustling in the soft, evening breeze.

Cold, mint green eyes bordered by black rings searched the riverbanks carefully as Gaara walked the river's edge, his footsteps soft and precise. He had slipped away from his brother and sister to prowl the forest on his own, hunting the other genin like a predator hunts its prey.

He wanted to feel something. He wanted to feel alive, and only through the death of others could he begin to grasp the elusive emotions of life. But it was always fleeting and it slipped through his fingers before he could truly begin to understand what those vague emotions meant. He was always left with the familiar feeling of cold emptiness...

Gaara's quiet steps came to a halt when he heard the soft sound of water splashing up ahead. The faintest thrill traveled up his spine, eyes narrowing as he resumed his steps, ever careful not to make a sound as he didn't want to frighten away his prey.

Peeking through the wall of trees and greenery, he caught sight of a Leaf Village genin who was knelt beside the river a few yards away, filling canteens with cool water. He appeared to be injured, scratches and bruises marring his face while his green jumpsuit was spattered with dirt and grass stains.

Gaara found himself pausing to observe the boy. He was definitely unique... Everything about him seemed to go to extremes, from his glossy black hair, which was cut into a tidy bowl cut, to his thick brows and rounded, innocent eyes rimmed with thick lashes.

He was intriguing, and Gaara felt something new stirring within himself, an emotion he had never felt before. He wanted to get a closer look at the boy, hear his voice, feel his skin. But why? Why did he want that? He had never wanted those things from anyone before...

The corners of his lips twitched downward as he started toward the genin without the cautious hesitance he had practiced before. He pushed through the brush carelessly as he raised his hand toward the boy, sand beginning to billow from the gourd on his back and twisting into a tight tendril before shooting toward the genin without warning.

Lee tensed when he heard rustling in the bushes and steps approaching, quickly lifting his gaze - and yelping to see sand quickly closing in on him. He dropped Neji's canteen in the river in his haste to jump out of the way, catching himself on all fours with a wince of pain, his and Tenten's canteens rattling against each other where they were clipped to the backpack around his shoulder.

A sand ninja? He was certainly an odd one, with fire red hair and skin so pale it reminded Lee of porcelain. And those eyes... This boy was intense. Lee was still injured from his earlier encounter with the sound ninja, and his body still weak from the effects of performing the Primary Lotus... He really couldn't fight another battle right now.

"I do not have a scroll if that is what you are after!" he called to his attacker as he cautiously watched the coiling, twisting sand. His aching legs trembled softly as they were poised to leap out of the way should the sand try to grab him again, his palms pressed flat against the grass.

Gaara's face remained calm and emotionless as he watched the nimble genin. "I don't want your scroll... I want you." he said in a cold, flat tone of voice that sent chills down Lee's spine.

"W-want me?" he asked quietly, confused. But he didn't have time to think too deeply into it as the sand lashed out again, forming hands. He leaped to the side and narrowly avoided its grasp, the ground trembling as it crashed into the earth instead. That was a lot of power - more than he had expected. If he had taken that hit, he would have been done for... He would have to be extremely careful here.

More hands formed and chased him down as he dodged and weaved, Lee feeling them disturb the air around him as they got closer and closer to grabbing him with each attempt. This was bad... His body couldn't keep up this pace for much longer. He needed to reach the forest and shake off this assailant.

After back-flipping away from a hand that came within inches of grasping him, he gave the last burst of speed he could muster and shot out of the wall of sand that was trying to encircle him, making a dash for the cover of the forest where he hoped to lose his attacker in the thick trees and greenery.

This boy was fast on feet, even while injured... That only made Gaara's curiosity and lust for him intensify. With a harsh sweep of his hand, the sand lunged forward in a twisting whirlwind of tendrils that Lee had no hope of dodging in his current state.

Lee cried out as his ankle was caught and he hit the ground, dropping his backpack at the border of the forest - before he was roughly pulled back toward the pale redhead. He kicked at the sand with his free leg before it too was snagged in a vice grip. He grunted as he struggled to free himself, his fingers digging into the ground and leaving deep gashes as he was pulled - before he yelped when the remaining tendrils grabbed his arms and slammed him down on his back, pinning him there.

He grit his teeth as he struggled, trying to get free of its grip somehow, but it was no use. "I-if you do not want a scroll, th-then what point is there to fighting?!"

The sand ninja approached his subdued prey calmly, finding that he really liked the sight of him pinned down on his back like this. He didn't bother answering the boy's question as he knelt beside him to get a better look at his prize. Now that he was closer, he could see how much tanner the boy's skin was compared to his own. And how much longer his legs were... Had he been standing, this boy would be taller than he was.

He studied his features, noting how soft and youthful, almost feminine, they were despite the fierce scowl he was giving. His body was lithe and fit, his waist slim, and hips surprisingly curvy. He had such lean, shapely thighs and long legs that just begged to be touched. He was... beautiful.

Slowly reaching out, he placed his hand on the struggling genin's cheek, feeling the boy tense beneath his touch and seeing the confusion in his big, expressive eyes. His skin was so soft and warm... He liked it - liked touching him. He wanted to touch more of him, wanted to feel him trembling beneath him, hear him scream, see his fear... He wanted everything he could take from this genin.

Releasing the boy's cheek, he suddenly reached down to grip the fabric of his jumpsuit and roughly tear it open, pulling until the toned chest and stomach were revealed to him.

"A-ah! What are you doing?!" Lee cried out, his eyes widening as a faint blush lit his cheeks. He tried instinctively to bring his arms down to cover himself, but the sand kept them firmly pinned above his head. Wh-when this ninja had said he wanted him... he couldn't have meant like THAT... Could he?

Gaara placed his hand flat against the boy's stomach, seeing as well as feeling the toned muscles clenching and flexing beneath quivering flesh. When he looked at this boy, he felt something different, something raw. Something that made his heart beat faster and took his breath away. Something that made heat pool between his thighs. He had felt sexual arousal on a few occasions, but never for a specific person, and never this strongly... This genin was different, special - he could show him what it was to be alive as no one else had.

With a flick of his wrist, the sand holding Lee's legs down shifted to instead pull them open, parting them wide as Gaara moved to settle between them. The look of fear that began to settle in those big, dark eyes reminded him of a frightened deer realizing it was cornered by its predator, wild and searching desperately for a way to escape.

Pale hands grasped the fabric between Lee's thighs and roughly tore it apart from the seams to reveal his inner thighs and low cut briefs, the genin giving a yelp as a deep blush burned across his cheeks.

"N-no! Get off of me!" Lee shouted, his voice laced with fear as he pulled against his bonds. His thighs trembled from the force he was exerting to close them, but the sand kept them open almost effortlessly. His heart pounded in his chest, panic beginning to set in as there could be no mistaking what this sand genin wanted. No no no! Please not this - anything but this!

Gaara shivered softly as the heat was building steadily within his body, the boy's fear and distress feeding his desire. He watched the gorgeously flushed features closely as a tendril of sand snaked around to hook on the hem of Lee's under garments, giving a hard tug that split the hip seams.

"Ah! Stop! P-please don't do that!" he begged desperately as the coil of sand pulled the torn garment away, leaving his privates exposed to the cold gaze. His cheeks burned crimson from the humiliation, his skin crawling. Sexual intimacy was one of the few things that made Lee unbearably uncomfortable, one of the few things that made him panic at the very thought, and he almost felt nauseous as he tried to close his aching thighs to hide himself. "Leave me alone! Wh-why are you doing this?!"

Green eyes narrowed sharply as Gaara shifted over the pinned genin, gripping his trembling thighs so tightly it pulled a sound of pain from Lee's lips. "Because I want your pain, your fear, your shame. I want you to show me what it is to be alive..." he growled in his quiet, breathy voice as he stared right into Lee's wide, scared eyes. "I want to feel alive with you..."

Lee trembled as his gaze was locked with those cold, soulless eyes. Wh-what on earth was this boy talking about? He was insane...

Gaara reached one hand down to slide his dark pants and briefs down his hips, releasing his aching member, which was now at full hardness. The sand parted Lee's trembling thighs wide and lifted his hips as Gaara shifted to press the dripping head of his length to the tight entrance.

Lee jerked to feel the member pressing against him, shaking his head vigorously. "No! No no no - please!" he cried, hot tears stinging his eyes as he pulled against the sand as hard as his body would allow, muscles trembling from the force, and wounds beginning to bleed as they reopened.

Gaara watched with fascinated hunger as tears began to drip from those dark, innocent eyes, the wetness sticking to thick lashes and almost making them glitter in the dwindling light of the setting sun.

Gripping the lean thighs so tightly it left bruises in the flesh, he pressed forward until the head of his member squeezed inside of the hot, dry opening. He shivered at the shout of pain it pulled from the boy, his member throbbing with arousal.

Lee's virgin entrance clenched up tight at the sudden invasion, the breath being ripped from his lungs as intense pressure and burning pain assaulted his senses. His back arched off of the ground as he gave a desperate cry of pain, tears of mortification streaming down his cheeks. "P-please stop! Get out of me - ahh!"

Gaara ignored the resistance from the tight ring of muscle, as well as the pleas for mercy, and forced himself deeper, sinking in until he was fully sheathed within the clenching, spasming heat. He shivered at the pleasure that lit his senses, a breathless moan escaping his lips as he felt the genin trembling beneath him and listened to his beautiful sounds of pain.

His grip on the supple thighs tightened as he pulled back until just the head of his length remained inside - before thrusting back in sharply, pulling a scream from the boy that only fueled his lust. He growled as he began to thrust in and out roughly, immediately setting a fast, relentless pace. Oooh, it felt so good... The tightness, the pull and drag of friction, the way the unwilling heat clenched around his rigid member.

Lee arched and writhed in agony, unable to hold back his sobs and screams of pain. He had never felt anything so painful before in his life! His entrance was stretched wide around the rigid girth and being rubbed raw from the lack of lubrication. Unbearable pain and humiliation engulfed his senses as he tried to break free from the sand's hold somehow. "S-stop! Please!"

Gaara panted, breathless growls of pleasure leaving his lips as he pounded the tight, virgin entrance mercilessly. He watched with eager eyes as tears rolled down those soft, flushed cheeks, the boy's gorgeous eyes wide with fear and panic. The deeper into those eyes he gazed, the more emotion he could see. Hurt, confusion, fear, disgust, shame... Until they closed tightly, the Leaf genin turning his face away from him.

He quickly reached out to clutch the silky-soft hair, pulling a shout of pain from Lee as he forced the boy to look into his bloodshot eyes once more. "Look at me." he growled huskily, a dangerous tone in his voice, "I want to see it... I want to see your pain... Y-you look pretty when you cry..."

The way those eyes stared into his own with such hunger was terrifying, Lee trembling as pain and emotion overwhelmed his mind. He felt lightheaded as his heart thundered in his ears, finding it hard to catch his breath. "P-Please, leave me alone!" he screamed as he closed his eyes tightly, wanting to escape the scrutinizing gaze - but a harsh tug on his hair had him opening them once more with a yelp of pain. He sobbed hopelessly as he was forced to gaze into the redhead's hollow, deranged eyes, feeling them penetrating the depths of his soul and greedily devouring every ounce of his tortured emotions.

Gaara thrusted harder and faster as the tingling energy of orgasm began to tease his senses, his breaths ragged as he searched for release within the tight, clenching heat. The blood that had begun to drip from the wounds caused by his rough thrusts slicked his member and made his movements easier, allowing him to delve deeper inside. He was so close, so close...

Lee's voice grew hoarse from the strain of his screams, and his struggles weakened as his already overworked muscles began to give out, refusing to do as he commanded. He had reached the end of his strength. What little hope he may have had left quickly vanished as his body went almost limp in the coils of sand, trembling from overexertion. He couldn't get free - there was no escaping this pain, this depravity.

Lee's body rocked from the force of Gaara's thrusts, every push and pull causing pain to erupt anew within him as blood dripped down to stain the grass beneath them. His throat ached, voice cracking when he tried to scream out from the hard, violent thrusts.

Gaara panted as he pounded the Leaf genin mercilessly, his body quivering - before he hit orgasm with a breathless yowl of bliss. His body shook with the rush of sensation and emotion, his digits clenching in the black, velvet hair and pulling it to receive of cry of pain. It was hard to focus through the searing pleasure of release, but he managed to catch sight of the horror and disgust on the boy's features as he spilled hot seed within his abused entrance.

He cried out miserably, shaking with disgust to feel the hot, stickiness of the boy's seed inside of him. Goosebumps prickled his flesh and his stomach churned, Lee having to focus hard to keep from vomiting as the Sand genin gave a few more painful thrusts... before slowing to a stop, giving him a blissful reprieve from the agony.

Gaara panted deeply, head back as he tried to catch his breath after the intense orgasm. His eyes were shut as he reveled in the tingling afterglow, trying desperately to hold on to the last threads of emotion, the last traces of what it felt like to be alive... before he began to come back down.

The sensations started to flicker out like a dying candle flame, as they always did, but this time was... different. Something remained, but he couldn't place what. He lowered his head as his eyes slowly opened, half lidded now as he watched his exhausted plaything. He noticed immediately that the dark eyes had slid shut sometime during his release, but he didn't bother to make the boy open them again. It was fascinating how he seemed to believe that he could hide from the world just by closing his eyes.

Shifting, he slowly released the now ruffled hair to instead take the boy's hips and begin pulling out.

Lee gasped sharply at the movement, shaking and giving a weak cry as his blistered, ripped entrance protested the rough action - before relief flooded him when the member finally pulled free. Traces of blood and semen followed the softening girth out, the combined fluids dripping down to mingle with the blood already staining the grass below.

Lee went limp as he panted shakily, his breaths catching in his throat as he struggled to suppress his sobs. He turned his face away from Gaara and kept his eyes shut tight, tears dripping thickly from his cheeks.

He felt filthy from the inside out... He had been violated to the very core of his being - and he had been unable to do ANYTHING to stop it. This Sand ninja had restrained and pinned him down without so much as a challenge, and then...

A heavy sob slipped past Lee's lips as he suddenly felt the overwhelming urge to hide himself. His aching limbs shifted in the sand's hold and, to his relief and surprise, it allowed the movement. As the sand melted away, he shakily shifted onto his side and slipped a trembling hand between his legs in an attempt to hide his flaccid member and abused, bleeding entrance. Oh please, please let this be over...

Having pulled his pants back up to hide his member away, Gaara stood and gazed down on the Leaf genin for a moment, watching his pointless attempts to hide himself... before turning and walking away without saying a word.

There was a lingering emotion that tugged at his senses and made him frown. It wasn't blood lust - no, this was different. It was something that weighed on his heart. In place of the hollow nothingness he was used to, was an odd, lingering warmth, a whisper of the emotions he had felt with the boy. He had been right about this genin... He was different from the others, special. He had felt more alive with him than he ever had with anyone else before.

Lee cautiously let his eyes flutter open when he heard the retreating steps, watching anxiously as the redhead walked away, almost fearing that he would turn back. His heart continued to pound in his chest, Lee not realizing that he was holding his breath until he released it when the boy disappeared back into the forest.

Other than his trembling, he didn't move from where he lay on the ground, a harsh sob spilling from his lips as he kept his hand between his trembling thighs, hiding himself as best he could.

He was hurting in so many ways... There wasn't an inch of his body that didn't hurt, and his mind was swimming with so many emotions it made him dizzy. He was confused, disgusted, humiliated... He just wanted to disappear or wake up and find that this had been a horrible nightmare... But that wasn't going to happen.

He needed to get up, his screams might have attracted other contestants, or even Neji and Tenten. And the last thing he wanted was to be found in this state...

Lee suppressed a broken sob as he started to push himself up, whimpering as the simple action caused pain to shoot through his body. Pushing through the pain, he forced himself up to sit on his hip, supporting himself with both hands. As he sat up further, he felt blood and semen dripping out of him, a wave of nausea hitting him hard - and he lurched forward as he puked up what little was in his stomach.

After his sick spell, he spat to get the awful taste out of his mouth and gave a miserable whimper. He took a moment to let his stomach settle before forcing himself to his feet, wincing all the way up as pain shot through his body.

Keeping one hand between his thighs to hide himself, he limped to where he had dropped his backpack, stooping over carefully to pick it up with his free hand. If he remembered correctly, he had packed an extra jumpsuit or two.

Limping his way back to the riverbank, he set the backpack down and, without bothering to remove his ruined jumpsuit, very carefully stepped down into the cold water. A shiver went through his whole body as he slowly lowered himself down to sit on his knees, the cold water coming up to his chest.

He continued to tremble as he let the river wash away any and all evidence of what had happened. Well, what evidence it could. It couldn't wash away the bruises, the pain, or the memory... The memory of those intense, mint-green eyes boring into his soul while he was violently raped... would never go away.

Closing his eyes, Lee tried to will away the tears that threatened to spill anew down his cheeks before shakily reaching a hand into the water to very tenderly rub away the blood and sperm that had dried around his entrance. He winced softly, biting back a sound of pain as he cleaned himself carefully, trying not to cause anymore pain than was necessary.

When he was finally satisfied that he was clean, or as clean as he could get while bathing in a river, he slowly stood from the water and had to rather crawl up onto the bank, his legs in too much pain to clear the steep incline as he normally could have. Every move he made hurt... But he had to hurry and get changed before anyone found him like this.

Panting softly from the effort, Lee grabbed the strap of his backpack and forced himself to his feet once more. He gasped at the pain it caused, whining and shivering before limping his way to the forest, where he peeled away what was left of his jumpsuit.

After changing into the fresh jumpsuit and legwarmers as quickly and carefully as he could, he hid the old ones in some thick brush and greenery. He didn't want to risk Neji or Tenten seeing them and asking questions... He didn't want to talk about it and he didn't want to have to come up with a fitting lie.

Bitter tears began to drip once more from his downcast eyes, their normally cheerful, enthusiastic glow hidden beneath a glaze of confusion and sorrow as he slowly and cautiously made his way back to where he had left Neji and Tenten.

He just wanted to be out of this forest, he wanted away from that sand ninja, from the other genin, from his own teammates... He just wanted to be alone...

But the chunin exams weren't over yet, and he couldn't just give up - he refused to do that. He could work through this, he could break through the pain like he always did.

At least... he hoped he could...


End file.
